Happiest of Oranges

Well over a year ago, while I was reading Rachel Wilkerson's blog, I came across a book that caught my attention. The title is Meeting Your Half-Orange by Amy Spencer. And its the first book that has made me contemplate a letter to the editor.



Spencer's concept of "dating optimism" reminded me of those silly girls with those silly vision boards that Oprah was so obsessed with for awhile. The concept of if you ask for it, it will come. Obviously I thought the idea was fairly ridiculous at first, but obviously I wouldn't be writing about it if I didn't end up completely altering my thinking. I read the book after almost 2 years post heavy break up, when my heart was truly open to love. And in every sense of the word, it changed my life.

What rang home true to me is that the more you focus on something, the more attention you give to it, you feed it. The thoughts grow, and the energy you put out into the world is what you focus most on. So if you find yourself complaining (Why am I single? Why are all the guys I'm dating assholes? Why can't I have a fairy tale ending?) Truly, those thoughts are negative, and the energy you put out into the world is negative. And what you get back (surprise surprise!) is negative.

I realized that society puts a lot of pressure on women to be happy single, to be happy independent, and to feel guilty when we ask for otherwise. When I read this book, and started to truly ask (in my head, and in my every day life) for the things I really wanted, magic happened. And then, J and I found each other, and had that exact magic I was looking for.

The beauty of Spencer's book is that it can spill over into all different types of situations in your life, like careers or family relationships. She has a new book out, Bright Side Up: 100 Ways to Be Happier Right Now, and its next on my two do list for our upcoming trip to Poland.

The moral of the story, I think, is to never close yourself off to any one path. Keep your mind and your heart open, be honest about your wants and needs, and the rest will somehow work itself out.